racial stuffs

[nubz]

To give the sort of racist generalizations that i know you want, I will start with the elves. Tall and slender, though more slender than tall. They average about 5'8", 150 lbs. Thats not that small, mind you. I'm an inch taller and ten pounds lighter, and i've got the same sort of slender bones and wiry muscles that I figure an elf would have. I grew up on a farm, and I can tell you with neither modesty nor ego that you can't push me around because I'm little. They dress mostly in forest type garb, brown slacks with a green tunic tied with a plain leather belt. The cloak is optional, but common as well. When it comes to dressing up, they've got fine white silks with gold and silver threaded embroidery, they do their hair up all pretty like, and they're fresh out of a fairy tale. Done.

Dwarves are a little different. The tallest among them are 5 feet tall, the heaviest weighing in around 200 pounds without armour. The way I do dwarves, their bones are made of enamel. Thats what teeth are made of. Its extremely heavy, and solid as a rock. Thus, their bonus to constitution stems from the fact its damn near impossible to break a dwarves bones. Everyone knows about the beards and stuff, so I won't bother. They have a long-standing tradition of family crests, uniformed armour, and proud beards. The average dwarf wears a boiled leather jerkin (thats like a long-sleeved shirt), studded leather pants, and army boots. Those born with status usually wear elaborate chainmail vests with multi-coloured links on their back to show off the family crest, fancier boots, and may dye their leather pants pretty colours. For the army type its different again. Privates wear unadorned iron ringmail shirts with thick black leather pants and boots, ranking officers have a breastplate in place of the ring, with their ranks engraved over the heart. Those that join a special forces task wear what comes with the job. The one you're most likely to run into are the Dwarven Darkhunters. These guys are special because it is a rank that you have to be born into. Starting with the traditional kite shield, they are allowed to put whatever they want on it and can change shields whenever they see fit, or go without if they dare risk it. They wear whatever boots they want, whatever armor they want, and say whatever they want. The only thing that is very standard about them is the fact that they carry the famous Dwarven Waraxe into battle, and the arm they swing it with is naked except for whatever tatoos they have. Each tatoo tells a story, and there are a few of the old timers who end up inked head to toe. The most famous is the dwarven war-hero Commander Cavebeard, leader of the hunters. He upholds what he deems 'tradition', by wading into battle with an iron-splinted kilt and his freakishly oversized Great Axe. He has an enormous tatoo of a minotaur on his back, and hundreds of other tatoos marking every victory he has fought for. As I said, it is a tradition thing, and as such every family's eldest child goes into the line of duty (exceptions are made for priesthood, in which case the next oldest in the family takes over, but usually the honour is a great one so noone leaves. Be warned, there may be a chance that I will use this as part of a future story line if any of you dwarfs out there seem up to the task)

[nubz]

For the less common races, i'm not nearly so picky. Mind you, as I said, I would prefer if you didn't, but if you've got a really good character then I guess its worth it. Halflings, there's three different types in the monsters manual, and I really don't care if you want to make them different yet again. Orcs, well, i've got three distinct clans of orcs, if you want to take this challenge on I dare you. Hobgoblins, if you've read the stuff on them its easy to know what you're dealing with, otherwise i'll say they've got a build like an athlete, not super buff but like a soccer player of basketball player or something. Oh, and they average 5'6", and have a face only a mother could love. If you really want to be a different race yet again, we'll have to talk. No, wait. You'll have to beg.

[nubz]

i guess i should talk about gnomes too. They range from one to three feet tall, naturally, but its not that simple. They suffer from allergies, so they've always got a large, red, bulbous, runny nose, and speak with a plugged up nasally voice. Not that that is in any way similar to myself. They're usually on the plumper side of things, preferring mental stimulation to physical activity. I'm not sure if i mentioned it somewhere else so I'll tell you straight out: they're all Illusionist wizards. They can't use spells from Divination or Necromancy, not even if they're a cleric or druid or anything else. Why? I took the part about magical races and extended it a bit further. Oh, and i switched their racial enemy from goblins to kobolds, but we'll go into that one later in the game.

now, as I said about it being not that simple, they are Illusionists. They can look like whatever they want to, but only the best of them can get rid of the runny nose and nasally voice. they avoid the other races as a practice, but being the pranksters they are stop by every now and then for a laugh. Some of the few that seem to have a good sense of humour about themselves, or are interesting in some other sense, are picked on more often than the others. (psst, that means you)

[nubz]

oh yeah, almost forgot.

elves use the longsword and longbow more than anything else. favoured classes are usually wizard, though there are a few different ones for a few of the different houses of elves. if you're an elf, i'll tell you about it, the other races don't get to know the difference.

dwarves go for the axe, naturally, except the clerics use the hammer. their favoured class is fighter, but if you want to know more about prestige classes i'll talk to you about it. the other races don't understand the intricate details of the dwarven warriors.

humans, they're a varied bunch. no favoured class, so no favoured weapon really. the only one that might count is their city guard has three main forces. there's the militia, which use a broadsword and a buckler. The Guardsmen, who are trained in polearms, like the pike or glaive or whatever. Then there's the hunters, noone really knows much about them. they are the ones who venture forth from the safe walls of the city to go looking for trouble, be it attacking the gnolls on their home turf, setting out on ships to go searching for pirates, hunting the various roads for bandits, or crossing the river to keep the orcs on their toes. i'm not going to go into this one, not yet anyways. but i think there's a few of you smart enough to realize what sort of purpose i have in mind.

if you haven't guessed already, make your character the way you see fit, and i'll tell you if you're in line with something i already have in the world. i'm going to be filling in more information as the game progresses, because i don't want to scare you guys with how wild and vivid my imagination is.